Time to Slow Down

Here’s a poem my spiritual director shared with us.

A Lazy Thought

by Eve Merriam

There go the grownups
To the office,
To the store.
Subway rush,
Traffic crush;
Hurry, scurry,
Worry, flurry.

No wonder
Grownups
Don’t grow up
Any more.
It takes a lot
Of slow
To grow.

The other day I called a dear friend. She’s 97 years old. She complained of being so tired, so slow. Summer is for slowing down - it should be conducive to contemplation.

But it takes a lot of slow to grow, as the poem says. We want to go, go, go. So we can forget the pain of who we are - deep, deep down. Where the real “me” is waiting to become all she is meant to become. Waiting to be discovered and embraced.

It’s summer. Slow down. Be “useless” as Henri Nouwen says. Hang out with God. It’s slow time, like the old age time of life. Grow time.

Legacy

Many years ago, when I was 8 or 9 years old, my aunt gave me a little pendant. It was a lucite heart with a tiny pink rose inside. She had bought it to help out a cousin who was out of work and selling them to tide his family over. I loved this little heart and wore it all the time.

Last December, I lost the little lucite heart pendant with the rose inside. I was heartbroken. You see, I had planned to leave it to my granddaughter; it was to be her legacy.

Now it was gone. I discovered it missing when I got home from my walk in the Botanical garden. I felt for it and oh no! there was the open chain around my neck but no pendant. I searched and searched. When my husband got home I was in tears. I called Lost & Found and went back to the Café the next day to search, retracing my steps, asking the staff to search. But finally, despite my prayers to St. Anthony, I knew it was gone. I couldn’t even tell anyone at first - I felt the same dull gut feeling of loss, like after my house was robbed, like after the terrible diagnoses of the past years, like after deaths of loved ones.

Why did I feel so devastated about a “thing”? And I came to realize it was really about keep me alive. My memory would live on in Marina, my granddaughter. When she wore the pendant she would remember me, how I loved the little locket, how I loved her. I would not be forgotten. I would live on somehow, through her. Was this a way of avoiding facing the reality of my own mortality? Of avoiding looking at death, time running out, and choosing to live life fully whatever time I have left. What opportunity, what dangerous opportunity did this loss, this “stripping” bring me today in this NOW moment. Humility? I am who I am. Marina is who she is. The mystery of how we “live” in others, the connection - well it’s a mystery to me.

I know I hold Marina in my heart. As I hold my grandmother in my heart. When I pray each morning. When Christmas comes and I think on the old days of Christmas Eves at Nanny’s and midnight Mass. When I do the jumble and think of her at the table each night, calmly and quietly pealing her orange, doing the jumble. What faith and love she (and all my forbears) left to me. What a legacy! How beautiful is the faith and love in Marina. It lives on.

And there’s a wonderful postscript to this story!

On Mothers Day I received a new pendant and it was a gift of love. My daughter Tina, Marina’s Mom, searched for a pendant on the internet to replace the lucite heart with the rose that I had lost. When she couldn’t find one she made me a pendant with a rose inside! Poured the resin into the mold and placed a little rose there. (You can see a picture of it by linking to "my daughter's blog" on the sidebar - then go to "A Heart full of Memories" May 8, 2011.) Just her desire to replace the lost heart that broke my heart fills me with humbling awe. Now this new pendant has an even better meaning and legacy that the 60 year old one that I lost. This new one represents the pure unselfish love of daughter for mother. It is a new symbol to treasure. Legacy. What connects us to the past and to the future.

6/2/2011

Spirituality of Late Life - Part 4

For other entries on Spirituality of Late Life see Spirituality of Late Life Part 1 below.

DEFINITION OF LATE LIFE SPIRITUALITY

So what is Spirituality of Later Life?

The second half of life offers many opportunities for spiritual growth. Late life is often a period of intense inner activity - a sorting out of decisions, relationships and commitments made during one’s lifetime. Psychologists call this process life review. Spiritual directors tell us that this looking inward can be a critical time of spiritual growth or crisis, as one comes to terms with the successes and failures of a life time. For one building on a lifetime of spiritual connection, it can be a period of great deepening of one’s relationship with God and others. As one nears the end of one’s journey, and realizes that much will be left incomplete, one can encounter the enormity of a God who accepts us and loves us unconditionally with all our faults and imperfections.

The many losses of aging - physical impairments, decreased mobility, chronic conditions, retirement from careers, empty nests, loss of loved ones - present a unique opportunity to reflect on the meaning of life and on one’s own life in particular. When one is stripped bare of material ambition, independence and even relationships, one faces one’s powerlessness in a very special way. The full reality of God’s love as gift can be experienced and the contemplative ideal of simply resting in God’s embrace may be realized. Of course, without spiritual guidance and support, this might well be a time of isolation and fear. The idea that older people are safely past spiritual crisis is a stereotype: each person grows or regresses in the spiritual life, at their own pace.

The spiritual odyssey of later life can be a challenge to those who are used to being productive; at the same time, it is an inner journey which can bear much fruit. For most Americans, interiority is a concept alien to our cultural bias for productivity. It is difficult to learn how to be still and silent, so one may discover God’s presence within. It is also painful and scary to look inside; older people, much like the young, seek noisy distractions to avoid the pain. Exploring Late Life Spirituality together in groups that foster faith sharing and reflection can be a help for us on this quest. Learning how to see God’s presence in one’s own life experiences, with the gentle support of companions on the journey, can be the greatest blessing of later life.

Spirituality of Late Life - Part 3

For other entries on Spirituality of Late Life see Spirituality of Late Life Part 1 below.

While I worked for Catholic Charities for 25 years, I oversaw various programs for older persons. Ministry to Seniors was our finest hour, training volunteers in the parishes of the Archdiocese to reach out to their elder congregants in various ways including visits to the homebound. One of the parish programs we initiated were Senior Spirituality Groups, which are faith sharing groups for older adults who wish to grow in their spiritual lives. Facilitated by trained leaders, the participants:

Reflected on their life experiences and God’s presence throughout.
Discussed spiritual aspects of everyday life and concerns.
Shared their unique faith journey with one another.

Prayed for the needs of group members.

The senior years can be a very challenging time of life; perhaps a time to become aware of the “new life” trying to emerge, to seek new opportunities for prayer and union with God, to “meditate and search our spirit“.

We might take time to reflect on our own life experiences and God’s presence throughout, or perhaps reflect on the spiritual aspects of our everyday lives and concerns. We may have the opportunity to share our unique faith journey with one another. In the senior spirituality groups, guided sharing and prayer was an integral part of the participants journeys - a true blessing.

In my next blog I will give a definition of late life spirituality to help us reflect on this special time of life.

Spirituality of Late Life - Part 2

Spirituality of Late Life Part 2 (Other entries on Spirituality of Late Life can be found below.)

The prayer below comes from my spiritual direction group. I used it in the first session “Becoming New in the Lord”. The image of “Grandmother God” came to me during Bio-spiritual focusing many years ago. It is an image that gives me great comfort and support when I am troubled. My grandmother was that kind of presence to me and I hope I have been the same for my grandchildren.

Grandmother God,
tender and compassionate,
understanding and forgiving,
cradle me in your arms this day,
balance me on your knee,
hold me in your lap
and never let me go.

Like your servants
Simeon and Anna,
even as I grow old,
may I never grow tired
of spending time with you in prayer.

Though I may become timid at times in my witness,
may I never limit the possibilities of the wonders
awaiting me around the corner.

I present my life with all its worries and wonders,
with all its scars and scary moments,
with all its hope and all its hurts
to you, my Grandma God.
You hold my life in your gentle hands.

Into your hands, I commend my spirit. Amen.

Stations of the Crib, Joe Hassah

Spirituality of Late Life - Part 1

During the past months of blog silence, I had the privilege of offering a series of workshops on Late Life Spirituality. I finished the latest yesterday at a nursing home. In the audience of some 50 elderly residents, many in wheelchairs and pushing walkers, all burdened with the ailments of advanced age, I beheld the most tranquil, smiling faces. These wise elders surely understand spirituality. They have traveled to those deep places and found God’s presence - even in the most difficult of life’s challenges.

So this “offering” of mine has returned many more blessings to me. I have been truly inspired by the depth of the journeys that have been shared with me this Fall. And in my next several blogs, I will share segments of my presentations.

The first session I called “Becoming New in the Lord”. Because all of life is for living and changing and trying new things. Below are the meditations that accompany Spirituality of Late Life Part I: Becoming New in the Lord.

There is always new life trying to emerge in each of us. Too often we ignore the signs of resurrection and cling to parts of life that have died for us.
Joan Chittister

Older people, with the wisdom and experience which are the fruit of a lifetime, have entered upon a time of extraordinary grace which opens to them new opportunities for prayer and union with God.
John Paul II

I consider the days of old,
I remember the years long ago.
I commune with my heart in the night;
I meditate and I search my spirit.
Psalm 77: 5-6

Spring Challenges

It’s been a challenging Spring for me. Busy with happy things: my granddaughter Sierra’s First Communion and grandson Chase’s Confirmation in May. Plus all the May birthdays: Sierra - 8; Marina - 17; and Chase - 14 years old! A big party on May 1st to celebrate all of the above plus my husband’s 70th birthday.

And then I was struck by a persistent cough, tickling in the throat, and hoarseness. Went to the doctor several times but it would not go away. They attribute it to the terrible pollen season we’ve been having but I - true to my nature - began to worry. In the meantime my back went out and I pulled a groin muscle (like A-rod!). I had to get a cane and I could not do my usual hour walk each day; in fact, I could hardly walk at all. This was awful since walking is my main exercise and helps me work off stress.

I became so frightened and my imagination was working overtime. Thankfully, I trust my doctors and they were very reassuring. In fact, everyone was being so nice to me. My friends were concerned and full of stories and helpful hints. Angel was wonderful, doing all the housework and shepherding me around.

I learned a powerful lesson from all of this. My independence, which I value so, is fragile - as it is for all of us. Learning to lean on others, to accept their help is difficult. Through all of this challenging Spring, one thing pulled me through. Prayer. I do remember to pray and even when I pray in darkness, without much hope, the answers come. In the form of doctors, friends, loved ones. A lesson I needed to learn indeed.

Poverty and the Elderly

Today is the day we blog about poverty, a world wide issue, even more scary in the current economic climate. In my retiree job as part time director of a small NYC advocacy organization, the New York Citizens’ Committee on Aging, Inc., we took on the issue of elder poverty when we discovered an alarming statistic. According to the data from the U.S. Census Bureau, "2005 American Community Survey", over 20% of New York City’s older adults were poor! And this in a city with such a high cost of living. We have made elder poverty our project for over a year, holding a May 2007 forum with seniors and key leaders in aging services, and following up with our colleagues to find ways to address this issue.

Needless to say, over the past year things have gotten a lot worse. Sometimes I feel that even older New Yorkers, like myself, lucky enough to have savings and a pension in addition to Social Security and Medicare, are just a step away from “poverty”, if that means being unable to afford housing, food and health care. So imagine how much harder the struggle is for our older neighbors on fixed incomes and such limited funds. What follows is an excerpt from our report, Under the Radar: Poverty Among Older Adults in New York City (May 2007 New York Citizens’ Committee on Aging, Inc.)

Poverty is more than a lack of financial resources; it is a serious threat to health and well-being, dignity, and the ability to participate fully in our society.(Economic and Social Council of the United Nations Commission on Population and Development. “Monitoring of population programmes, focusing on the changing age structures of populations and their implications for development, Report of the Secretary-General,” December 28, 2006.)

Unfortunately, in recent years the problem of poverty amongst older adults has become increasingly invisible. Many people believe that the vast majority of seniors are affluent – or at least receiving adequate assistance. The major cause behind this misconception is the success of programs such as Medicare and Social Security, which have greatly alleviated economic insecurity among older adults. In fact, poverty among Americans age 65 and older has fallen from one-in-three persons in 1960 to one-in-ten today. (Whitman, D. & Purcell, P. (2006). Topics in aging: Income and poverty among older Americans in 2005.)

These successes cannot be denied and our country should be proud of this progress. Work remains, however, for too many seniors have been left behind. While poverty among persons age 65 and older in the United States has decreased, it has actually risen in New York City. (New York City Department for the Aging. “Annual Plan Summary, April 1, 2007 – March 31, 2008, For Older Americans Act and New York State Community Services for the Elderly Program and Expanded In-Home Services for the Elderly Program,” September 2006.)

In 2005, the U.S. Census Bureau set the poverty threshold for
individuals age 65 and older at $9,367. (U.S. Census Bureau. “Poverty Thresholds 2005.”) If a senior’s annual pretax income falls below this amount then he or she is considered “poor.” While updated annually, this threshold is the same throughout the contiguous United States and does not reflect regional differences in cost-of-living. According to this measure, 9.9% of older Americans lived in poverty in 2005, which represents a continued decline of poverty among this age group nationwide. Yet, the poverty rate among older adults living in New York City was twice the national rate: 20.3%. (U.S. Census Bureau, 2005 American Community Survey.) This is a significant problem that is not mirrored in all urban areas. In fact, among the twenty most populous cities in the United States, New York is second only to Detroit, Michigan in the percentage of its seniors living in poverty.

New York City is home to over 943,000 people who are age 65 or older. Approximately 191,653 of these seniors live in poverty, but what is known about them? According to the U.S. Census: 68.3 percent of these seniors are female; 37.3 percent are male. 47.9 percent are age 65 to 74; 52.1 percent are age 75 and older. 59.8 percent experience one or more physical, mental or emotional disabilities.

Poverty is most prevalent among racial and ethnic minorities …. The poverty rate among the City’s Hispanic elderly population is three times the national average, while the rates for Black and Asian elderly are more than double that rate.

Disability can be either a cause or consequence of poverty. In New York City, the percentage of seniors who are both poor and disabled is over twice the national rate: 5.5% versus 12.1%

In basic terms, poverty results from the discrepancy between income and expenses. A person is “poor” when his or her income is woefully inadequate to cover expenses that meet basic needs, such as food, housing and transportation. In New York City these expenses are immense. In fact, New York City is the most expensive city in which to live in all of North America (NNMoney.com. “World’s Most Expensive Cities,” June 22, 2005.)

Since this is such an important topic, to be continued.....

Ministry to Seniors Part 2

Ministry to Seniors (MTS) also developed other programs and trained parishes in their implementation. Since we knew that a one shot, four hour volunteer training was insufficient to sustain a parish outreach to the homebound ministry, we used several strategies to address the issue of on-going training and preparation of the parish volunteers including:

On-site one-on-one training of the parish coordinators who were responsible for the operation of parish programs. We developed a training manual that covered particulars on recruiting volunteers, identifying the homebound, matching, record keeping, supporting volunteers, and more. And later we partnered with Fordham University’s Partners in Healing program to bring special training programs, with more spiritual emphasis and advanced listening skills to our veteran volunteers.

A quarterly reporting system and annual evaluation was devised to publish statistics and anecdotes on parish service in a newsletter distributed to all 400+ parishes in the Archdiocese. This also served as an alert to staff when problems or concerns were reported.

Ministry to Seniors staff held regional meetings for parish coordinators on a regular basis to provide ongoing support, sharing, information and training. MTS also modeled Volunteer Recognition Events, by honoring parish coordinators with awards, luncheons and gifts, Parish coordinators were encouraged to hold similar volunteer meetings and recognition events in their own parishes.

We learned that our volunteers provided real services, especially in rural areas where they transported patients long distances for dialysis or cancer treatments. From their stories and from listening to volunteers at meetings, we knew that many volunteers derived deep satisfaction from visiting. Many developed close friendships with those they served. Volunteers had been asked to serve as pallbearers at the funerals of those they visited. Others had noticed that the visiting program had bridged the gap between peoples of different colors and cultures, as they ministered to one another. And other volunteers had uncovered potentially life threatening situations and referred them to professional staff for intervention.

During this busy time in the late 90’s and even after 2001, we developed other models for parishes to serve their older members, notably Senior Link, Caregiver Support & Respite and Senior Spirituality Groups. Our programs were recognized nationally with a 1999 Daily Points of Light award, as well as other honors.

Senior Link was designed as a parish-based information and referral/advocacy program to help seniors and their families access needed entitlements/benefits and services in the community. Training and ongoing support were provided to program coordinators, mostly parish staff but also volunteers. Caregiver Support & Respite was provided through a six week workshop series based on Dr. Richard Johnson’s video course “You and Your Aging Parents” and follow-up support groups. Later we introduced the Powerful Tools for Caregiving (PTC) program in the New York area, an innovative approach to empowering caregivers to care for themselves. These caregiver services were implemented in our rural counties through funding from Older Americans Act Title IV and private grants.

Senior Spirituality Groups offered older adults opportunities for spiritual growth through faith sharing, reflection, prayer and discussion activities. Meeting on a regular basis at parishes and community facilities, the groups helped participants to see God’s presence in their life experiences. The group facilitators received training and ongoing support from Ministry to Seniors.

Looking back at this “golden age” of my career at Catholic Charities, I feel very blessed and grateful for the wonderful, talented people who worked so hard to serve the elders of our parishes. Not only my staff and colleagues at Charities but also parish staff, coordinators and volunteers, as well as the seniors themselves. It is amazing how much good people can do, with the help of the Lord. It was a privilege indeed to work with them and serve them.

A spring poem

To celebrate my daughter's honorable mention in a recent town poetry contest, I am sharing one of my oldest poems. I'll try to get her to post her winning poem, which is really a treat.

Boulder on the Hill

I am part of the earth.

I am bound to the ground,
longing to leap alive
into the blaring blue.

Crust warm and worn
stippled and stained
insulted, ignored
decaying, defiled

Youth passes me by
flying free, singing Spring!
All a-spin in the whirlwind.

While I lie alone
so old
so hard
so forgotten

I am one with the earth

I hold the light of 10,000 suns.
I hold the tears of 10,000 storms.

Crust soft, astir
teeming with life
buzzing with wisdom
glittering with grace

Youth stops to savor my story,
transformed by my treasure
for all ages.

While I watch and wait
so ancient
so loved
so timeless
copyright E.M. Ramos 5/30/96

Mother Teresa and Too Much Stuff

Lately I’ve been trying very hard to de-clutter. I feel buried by my “treasure”: too many boxes, too many clothes, too many trinkets. And yet… it is so hard to let go. If I could be sure that an individual or an organization would appreciate my precious thingys, it would make it a lot easier to donate them. But each item seems to have emotional baggage and I end up feeling like a prisoner of my possessions.

First of all, they need to be organized or I don’t remember that they even exist, much less where they are. Items with sentimental value – like drawings made by my grandkids (come to think of it, I may have some of my kids' drawings too!) or the last Avon pin that my Mom gave me or a birthday card from my daughter – these are especially hard to part with. It’s like I’m throwing away their love. And then there’s the hundreds of old photos. I can’t breathe thinking of it!

And of course I want to guard all my things, especially the emotionally valuable ones. When my house was robbed last year, I discovered how painful it is to lose my belongings. I felt violated. From time to time, I remember another thing that was stolen and the wound opens again.

The very act of cleaning out forty plus years of accumulations and to whom I should bequeath what, raises the terrifying thought of my own mortality. Bad enough to die but then to have your sweet stuff forgotten too! Oh no! No wonder I am stuck in this house that I think I want to move out of.

Filling up the bottomless black hole with “stuff” enslaves me in a way. Yet no matter how hard I try, I wind up buying more “stuff” I don’t really need. I have been reading Mother Teresa’s letters: Come Be My Light. The beginning reveals how she pestered the powers that be to let her heed the “call” to live in the slums of Calcutta. What intrigued me about this mission of hers, is how much she longed to become one of the poor, to give up all possessions. And I have come to see that this is what truly frees you. Maybe this is not as selfless as it seems – maybe it is just smart to detach yourself from material goods.

Never enough time...

Sometimes time is on my mind when I'm not even aware of it. Like when this poem came to me last Memorial Day.....

Memorial Day

Folded boulders, remnants of the last
Ice Age to hit the Bronx,
Deeds deep hidden in their wrinkled crevices,
Deeds all but forgotten.

Trunks of trees, wrung out like wash rags
drying in the heat of May,
Fear forever frozen in their furrowed faces,
Fear of what will never be.

Breathless breezes bathe the aching head,
cool the heated heart while
Thoughts of Death invade the mind,
terrorize the soul, paralyze the will

Not enough time
to get it all done
to do it all right
the way it should be

Not enough time
Never enough time
Now there really is
Not enough time.

Copyright E.M. Ramos 5/29/2007

FRIENDS: OLD AND NEW

One of the blessings of retirement is the time to refresh friendships, reconnect with old friends and make new ones. And today, there are so many ways to “be with” friends.

This past year or so, I’ve noticed that my “in person” getogethers with my long time pal Pat have been happening more often. We share two of my favorite pastimes – eating out and “window shopping” at the Mall.

Then there is the group of ex-Catholic Charities colleagues that meet once a month to do museums or cultural sites. We’ve done Met tours, Botanical Gardens events, trips to the Zoo, the Nassau County Museum of Art and the Talbot’s outlet (how’d that get in there?). To tell the truth our monthly gatherings are 90% café and conversation and 10% culture. Last month we even ran into another “friend from work” at the Met, so there were six of us.

There have also been many friends from the past that I can spend more time with via e-mail; this blog has brought messages from many. And some visits are planned for next month with friends I haven’t seen for years.

For my internet challenged pals, who live far away, I’ve logged in more phone time, especially with A. who lives on a farm in the mid-West. A. and I go way back – to our college days at St. John’s University.

During the Transition Retreat I made last June (see July 5th blog) one of the retreatants reminded me of a dear friend Mary, a lively 90+ year old who lives in California. I was prompted to make a long overdue phone call and found that she had been seriously ill. How glad I was to speak with her!

My dream of making new friends in retirement is taking a bit longer but I trust that my pursuit of volunteer service and a spiritual direction group starting in a few weeks may bring new people to grace my life.

Good "Old" Summer

I wrote the following article many years ago for a parish newsletter to the homebound. And wouldn't you know! It's just how I've been feeling lately.

Good "Old" Summer

The season of summer sometimes reminds me of the season of late life --- old age! Just as the heat of summer weighs us down heavily and demands that we slow down, so too the losses of aging weigh us down and slow us up.

When I pause to rest and enjoy the lazy days of summer, I notice nature at peak productivity. There’s almost too much beauty to take in. We need time to see the butterfly on the blade of grass or the tiny flowers growing out of the hollow of the towering oak. Summer is God’s gift to us, an invitation to hang out with His creation and praise Him in His glory!

Can it be much the same with our experience of “old age”? When we need to walk slower because of arthritis, is this an opportunity to see what we once missed as we hurried on by? When friends and loved ones are no longer with us, we are left with our memories, our life stories. And perhaps, like with summer’s bounty, there is too much to take in all at once. One of the blessings of later life is time --- time to consider our own unique story, time to heal the hurts and celebrate the joys, time to grow in wisdom and to simply “hang out” with God.

Ministers to the homebound have a special role to play in this process of life review. They can listen to the stories of those they visit, without judging, fixing or giving unasked for advice. It helps to have a caring companion as we review our life journey with all its pain and laughter, triumphs and sorrows.

And as we discover that throughout our lives, God has been there holding us, supporting us and loving us, even when we were least aware of it, we thank Him for His gift of life.

Walking in the Dark

I am so grateful to those of you who have commented on my poems, either on my blog, by e-mail or by phone. So your reward is - more of my poems!

Today's poem is another "summer" poem, and one of my favorites from the year 2000. I like to write in seasons, but this poem is about growing older and the journey, as much as it is about summer.

Walking in the Dark

I notice that July slips by
more quickly that her
sister months,
as if the warmth of summer
cannot hold its breath
for long.

The long lit eves I looked to
with such longing all the
year
begin to dim as darkness
reassumes his righteous
reign.

The verdant fields once youthful
with blooms of ev'ry hue and
grace
take on an aging pallor,
reflecting my own graying
face.

Ah, days of light!
So short and sweet
with promise and deceit,
make way for long, dark nights
that strip dreams
to the bone
and thrust us on the way
in earnest.
Copyright E.M. Ramos 7/24/2000

An August Blessing

I have noticed that many of my recent poems deal with "transition". The one I will share today was written in the summer (how appropriate) of 2006, shortly after I retired that June. It deals with my struggle to begin a new phase of my life.

An August Blessing

Peeking through the holes I see
Pieces of the sky
Holy trees
Peaceful clouds
Bless me on the way.

Sitting still upon a bench
Surrounded by a kiss
Quiet rest
Gentle breeze
Calm me on the way.

Melting down the grief of June
As anger bids farewell
August heat
August hope
Heal me on the way.

Clinging to my treasured trove
Unwilling to let go
Cluttered home
Heavy heart
Teach me on the way.

Walking with nowhere to go
Watching every step
Precious time
Prayerful feet
Guide me on the way.
copyright E. M. Ramos 10/15/2007

Inner Elder

I am off and running! And that feels great! I want to thank my daughter, Tina for encouraging me to start my own Blog. Beginnings are full of hope, especially when you're older. I see this Blog as an opportunity to share my thoughts, my feelings, my poetry, my experience and my dreams. To keep my computer literate friends up to the minute on my adventures and to meet new people in the exciting world of cyberspace.

Inner Elder is also the title of my self-published books of poetry. My poems best express who I am and I look forward to sharing them.